Not So All Alone in the Night
by Lara Reed
Summary: How did John Sheridan spend his first Christmas Eve in command of Babylon 5? I hope you enjoy this little gift to J&D fans. Merry Christmas to all!


John Sheridan casually opened the front of his Earth Force uniform jacket and began to shrug it off, but long years of adhering to rigid military decorum prevented him from actually removing the uncomfortable garment.

As his eyes swept around C&C, he was aware that he could theoretically abandon all notions of decorum during this particular shift without there being any consequences. He wouldn't be setting a bad example for junior officers, or earning a raised eyebrow from Ivanova, because for only the second time since he'd assumed command of the station nearly a year earlier-he was alone in C&C.

It was Christmas Eve, and he'd given the night crew who would ordinarily be manning the work stations around him the night off to celebrate. He didn't expect that there would be much to do even though Christmas was a holiday that was only celebrated by people from Earth and its' colonies because members of the other races had learned from experience that most activity on the station ground to a virtual halt while the humans observed their holiday.

After facilitating the docking of two late arriving shuttles and diffusing a complaint from an initially irate Londo Mollari, Sheridan had lowered the lighting, put his feet up on his desk and settled in to enjoy an uninterrupted opportunity to view the stars outside the viewport in front of him.

John Sheridan wasn't accustomed to long periods of inactivity. They made him feel restless and they gave the unpleasant thoughts that he made a concerted effort to keep at bay the chance to reassert themselves.

 _I can't believe it's another Christmas without Anna. Was it only five years ago that we'd spent the holiday together visiting the farm?_

They'd thoroughly enjoyed catching up with his family, but desiring some much needed couple time, they had snuck away to the barn. A wistful smile played across his face as he remembered how much time they'd spent pulling hay from their hair and clothing before they returned to the house. Since Anna's death, those memories, and others like them, had become both a blessing and a curse. He was determined to never forget anything about their time together…yet when he allowed himself to dwell on those memories it made him miss her all the more.

He slowly stood up and began to pace the length of C&C. _What I need now is a distraction. A problem to solve, not a major disaster, just a little snafu to deal with,_ he mused. As if on cue, a chime sounded signaling that someone without regular access to C&C was at the entrance seeking admittance. _Watch out what you wish for, Johnny._

"Come," he ordered, granting his visitor admittance while he guardedly strode towards the door with his fingers grazing the PPG he wore on his hip.

"That won't be necessary, Captain, I come in peace," Delenn said tranquilly, but without advancing through the portal.

"Ahh, of course it isn't…I'm sorry." He quickly removed his hand from his sidearm. "I wasn't expecting you," he hurried to explain, mortified that he'd practically pulled a weapon on the Minbari ambassador…on Delenn. "Actually, I wasn't expecting anyone-I'd planned to spend tonight alone."

"So I heard," she relied saucily, breezing past him with a large basket that he hadn't initially noticed she was carrying, "and I find that plan unacceptable," she advised him.

He took two long strides to catch up with her. "Unacceptable," he questioned with a bemused expression on his visage.

"Totally," she responded without hesitation, as she placed her basket on the center of his desk as though it were her own space. "Tonight is one of your peoples' major festivals, is it not?"

"Yes."

"In that case, you shouldn't be spending the night working and alone, you should be celebrating," she stated matter-of-factly.

"I am ALONE and I have no intention of celebrating," he countered petulantly. The set of his shoulders was proud and defiant, but the look in his eyes was one of such utter sadness that it practically took her breath away. Unwilling to allow her to see through his defenses, he turned away from her, and returned his gaze to the stars.

"You are not alone!" She walked around to stand in front of him again. "I know that your family is far away, and I don't presume to be able to imagine how much you miss your wife, but you are most definitely not alone here unless you choose to be. There are a lot of people on this station that care about you…and I'm one of them. If I didn't care deeply for you-"

She paused as his gaze rose steadily from his feet to meeting her eyes. The sparkle had returned to his hazel orbs and she could see the hint of a smile.

Encouraged, she continued, "-I wouldn't have braved the hordes of what I believe your people call last minute shoppers to secure some of the comestibles that are tied to the celebration of Christmas. Are you going to dare to refuse me the honor of sharing this traditional meal with me?"

"I wouldn't dream of it." He bestowed a dimpled smile on her and took her right hand in his left. "Thank you for this, and for always being there for me this past year."

"You're most welcome. I know that during this past year, there have been moments when each of us has felt all alone in the night, but I've come to realize that as long as we have each other neither one of us has to be alone again."


End file.
